Kristin's first sleepover

Well, let's see, it's 12:43 a.m. on Friday night.

Kristin is having her first sleepover, here. She's stayed overnight at other places, but this is the first time it's been here. And they're still awake. 5 year olds, and it's 12:48 now. (I had to pause writing this paragraph, hence the 5 minute delay between paragraphs because they stormed in here fighting and crying).

...I think they are down now for the night. I hope so anyway. Apparently this fight was over covers.

This sleepover has been a good reminder to me as to what's important. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in things, work or the dynamics of adulthood, that it takes moments like this to snap me back down to where I need to be.

Toney's passed out on the couch. He didn't even try sleeping in our bedroom because it's adjacent to Kristin's room and if there wasn't a book reading or play kitchen scenario going on in there, there was a pillow fight. So he just crashed out in the living room. I'm in the office reading, working on this puzzle we've had forever and surfing. I've got the night and he'll have to handle breakfast because I'm sleeping in.

It's been a good night though, Kristin's first sleepover, she'll look back on fondly. They had ice cream and cheetos after 9 pm. Gasp. They had fun. We'll work on getting the sleep schedule back in the next day or two.

Summer, Fish and Links

We didn't do much for Memorial Day, but we did go to a shopping center in Monterey and a dog beach in Carmel. Clearly there is no recession going on in those places.

We did find a great store, REI, (Recreational Equipment, Inc.) with some good stuff for camping. I imagine we will be shopping there a lot this summer.

11 school days left. I was going to enroll Kristin in swimming lessons this summer, but we just got our family reunion scheduled at the lakehouse and it's right in the middle of the lessons. So I guess I will try and teach her myself at the municipal pool early this summer.

I'm still working on our menu, we are going to eat more meatless meals, more seafood, and more fruits and vegetables this summer. When I was growing up, my family then (parents, sisters, etc.) always ate 'hearty' meals and we never had consequences. For some reason, now my family (Toney and I) are. With my high triglycerides and his diabetes, some lethargy, maybe even his kidney stones related to diet, it's like 'what is going on here'? I didn't think we were eating THAT bad.

Here are some good links for places to find the safest fish.
The Marine Stewardship Council list of seafood grown in safe fisheries.

Which seafood to buy, where and why, at www.seafoodwatch.org.

Fish rated by contaminants.

Typical family day. Emergency room, shopping, field trip, and that's just by noon.

I woke up this morning to Toney thrashing at the foot of the bed. Kristin was sleeping next to me, she ALWAYS comes into our bed sometime in the middle of the night. About 4 or 5 am, I'm waking up battling for covers. There isn't enough room for the three of us.

Anyway, I woke up because Toney was thrashing at the bottom of the bed. He was laying sideways at my feet. I was vaguely aware of Kristin lying beside me, lifting her head up too because he woke her up as well.

"What's wrong?" I ask, groggy and irritated about being woken up again. I assume it is another battle of the covers. "I don't know," Toney says, thrashing around some more.

After awhile, his whimpering and crying really wakes me up. Something is wrong. "Do you need me to take you to the hospital?" Now I am assuming it's appendicitis.

"Yes" he replies. I quickly dress Kristin and myself. She's all worried, not knowing what is going on. At 6 a.m. we arrive at the emergency room and I begin the paperwork. I'm stunned at how they let Toney sit there and squirm while they ask questions. I can't help but wonder why someone isn't treating him while I give them information.

It turns out to be kidney stones. After I did the paperwork and they took him into another room, I brought Kristin back home and gave her breakfast and waited for her friend to show up so we could go to school.

Today they had a field trip to Toro Park, (big state park, not the typical small park). After I took them to school, I got a call from our friend who stopped by the hospital to check on Toney. She told me that they were waiting on lab work and it would take several hours. (At this point, we still didn't know what was wrong).

So I went to Costco. The kids were due back at the house after school and I had no lunch for them. I was out of mayo, ketchup, bread, nuggets, a whole bunch of stuff.

I got the groceries and got back in time to pick the kids up from school. And from there we went straight to the hospital to pick Toney up. He's all mad because I wasn't there in case something went wrong.

I feel bad, but what can I do? Was I supposed to keep the kids in the emergency waiting room for the 6 hours it took? I don't want to make it seem like I wasn't concerned, but my friend told me that when she checked on him, they said it would be several hours before there was any new info. Is it wrong for me to use those several hours to continue to run the house?

Kidney stones. It looks like it really hurts. He can't sit, sometimes he can't lay down, and at those times, all he can do is pace. The painkillers (valium) doesn't seem to be strong enough.

And on top of all that, once he got home around noon, I was thinking "aha! Now he can see how these girls fight and hit each other and battle."

Of course, they were complete angels. He laid on the bed for awhile to sleep and they played at the foot of his bed for about three hours without getting above a whisper. Hello? Who are these girls and what did they do with the girls I've been trying to get control of, for the last three weeks?

Our Memorial Day weekend plans are up in the air. We found this great beach that allows dogs last week and we took our dog and it was so great we want to do it every week. Maybe not this weekend.

He's home tomorrow. Okay, after school let's see if these girls are still angels. Two days in a row would be VERY surprising. So maybe, he'll see.

Never Enough Time

Kristin has more toys than most kids she knows, yet they will still fight over a doll the size of her thumb. They've destroyed the garden, trash the house daily, fight, play, fight, play. Every other day, I try to take them somewhere, just to get them out of the house, it's all a full job, but I think the hardest thing of all, in regards to running a family, is losing time.

The battles have gotten easier to deal with, now that I'm getting experience at it. It's just that it takes so much time to run a family, I'm not sure how I'm supposed to go find more work/clients, when I can't even get all the work I have to do already, done in any given day.

I try to get the house cleaned up by 8:00 a.m. so that I won't have to spend any daytime doing housework (never succeeded yet). I am trying to spend the daytime drumming up more work. Once school is out, I'm not sure how I'm going to continue doing that.

Meals can still be haphazard based on what inventory I have, and I'm trying to come up with a system that includes good meals, yet something I know picky eaters will eat. It's time consuming. The cost of food rising is forcing us to try and grow more vegetables and I need to try to go back to making my own breads, and things from scratch since it is cheaper than buying stuff already made. It's so time consuming.

Rising gas prices require me to drive less, so when we go to the park, I will pull them in the wagon. It took 3 minutes to drive to the park, it takes about 15 to walk. That's 30 minutes extra lost every time we go to the park. That 30 minutes has to come from somewhere.

My daily to-do list runs anywhere from 20-28 things per day. I am lucky if I accomplish 5-8.

There has to be a better way to organize my day. Sometimes I think I over organize/schedule, but I get absolutely nothing done if I just wing it.

Shake Your Salt Shaker

It's been interesting to see the transformation in Kristin over the last few weeks, now that she has someone to play with all day.

I always used to blog about how good she was, and it wasn't an exaggeration, she was really a little angel with just a few temper tantrums here and there. Well, now, with a peer around all day, she's more...um...normal.

She cut her bangs a few days ago and yesterday she decided to pretend that the salt shaker was a magic wand, and she picked it up, just minutes after I finished mopping and waved it all around the dining room coating the table, computer equipment and the floor in salt.

I did scold her for it, but didn't really punish her. When I told Toney about it in the evening, even he said 'kids will be kids'. While she knows it's wrong and to not do it again, at the same time, I'm grateful to see her acting more like her peers, even after I just get done mopping.

She got in more trouble for lying about cutting her bangs (I don't know how it happened, Daddy), than for actually chopping her hair into chunks. Stuff happens.

Two of a Kind

Kristin stayed home today, she was up all night coughing so we let her watch tv all through the night. Whenever this happens, I just put her in the living room in front of the tv, cozy her up with a blanket and pillow, make sure she has a snack - dry cereal, goldfish or something, some juice, and I head off to bed. She watches tv, dozes off and on, and coughs all through the night. Triaminic must have caffeine in it, because I know when I give it to her she will be alert for the next 6 hours.

So, because she was awake all night, I took her friend to school and picked her up and Kristin slept through most of it. They played good today, there was little fighting. Mostly because Kristin didn't have energy, so she slept a lot while her friend watched tv. They played a bit but it was a mellow day.

We are finishing up week 2 of having her friend over all day and I've learned some more background which helps me to understand how things play out here. Two strong divas in the house, it hasn't been pretty this last week and a half. The battles have been cruel.

Well, her friend grew up in an environment of gangsters. They lived out of town, and moved into town to be closer to work. When they lived out of town was the different environment. So, Kristin's friend, who is in kindergarten too, had peers who had parents who were in gangs. This influenced the kids, which influenced her. She would have her arm twisted in school, with the other kids telling her, "are you going to cry yet?".

Ouch. Now I understand and have more sympathy for her defiance. Kristin has defiance because she was a single child who I pampered. So now there are two defiant divas battling for everything from this or that toy to a hand to hold, to a seat in the living room.

But I have a better understanding of things now. And I talk to them and let them know, 'hey, we are here together everyday. Let's make the best of it and have fun, isn't that what we want?'

It seems to be working. Kristin's friend is coming around (willing to make concessions) faster than Kristin.

We'll get there. It's been a rough two weeks, but we are making good ground.

These two divas are strong willed. Hillary Clinton like. And they are starting to really bond. And stick together. It will be formidable.